She was a panelist today at a conference I did not attend.

So it is all very second hand, you see. But I trust the girlfriend who told me.

Someone asked a question about balancing an academic life with family. "Oh, this is not really possible, you know. Especially not if you want to be good at what you do. I am dedicated to academe. I don't really have a life besides academe, because when you really love something, you just do it. You don't need anything on the side," she said. (Not her exact words, obviously. But close enough.) No one said anything. I know my friend did not speak because she is afraid of this professor. I don't blame her. But the other faculty members? The visitors? Not a fucking word.

It is because of such people that it is so hard to balance academe and personal life. Because some holier-than-thou, superior feeling asses impose their righteous (and downright insane) choices of life upon the rest of us. And that we let them do it, because we're insecure at heart.